Tag Archives: language

Asking gender on surveys

Frequently, when people set up surveys, they ask for gender. This question is often included out of habit, but it still is often a relevant question, even if the only contribution of the question is to show that gender doesn’t have a significant influence on other responses. In modern efforts to be more friendly to gender minorities, the gender question is often updated. And it’s often updated in silly ways.

Here’s the two most common “inclusive” ways I have seen the gender question presented over the last few years:

a) What is your gender?
* Male
* Female
* Transgender
* Prefer not to say

b) What is your gender?
* Male
* Female
* Other

There are minor language variations, such as sometimes using “transgendered” instead of “transgender”, but this is the gist. So, what’s wrong with these? Continue reading

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This whole “Catching Wine” thing

I almost never talk about religion on here (I don’t remember if I have at all yet, so this page may be the exception), but I think in this case it’s useful for describing what this blog is about and who I am, and hopefully it’s more interesting to read than a list of credentials. I promise to keep it non-preachy. If you wanted a sermon this isn’t generally the blog to read. I am more likely to talk about things like transgender issues, kink communities, design quirks, and media bias. Most of what I do here is intended to show the complications in apparently simple situations, or to make apparently inscrutable situations a bit more accessible to people who aren’t already intimately familiar with their workings. (Relevant credential: my day job includes writing technical documentation that doesn’t make end users miserable and bug reports that make developers want to throw as few things as possible.) Anyway, my point is that this isn’t a sermon, it’s about me.

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On casual sex and being pursued as a trans person

I’m a trans man, and I like having casual sex with strangers from the internet. Casual sex is a risky and weird space, and there’s some awesome things that come with that – risk can be a big turn-on and weird spaces can be great for nonnormative sexuality. One of the things I love most about casual sex is the way it can bring together people from vastly different areas of life: I’ve met some interesting people I probably never would have interacted with through work, school, or social circles, and if I did interact with them there we likely never would have talked about sex the way we were able to through the circumstances of our meeting, much less had sex. I didn’t really realize just how much this was the case until I wound up having casual sex with someone in the local kink community, where you’d think the barriers to open sexual conversation and engagement might be different, but they’ve turned out to not be that different, especially for sex and gender minorities. My own experience in the local kink community has been that I still wind up finding it best to stick to queer and trans centric spaces, meaning…basically the same social circles I have otherwise, only kinkier. Sometimes. Okay, they’re basically the same social circles.
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